To say this is the only thing on my mind is silliness. To put forth this as the only thing on my mind is equally absurd; however, one can’t help but wonder who (or what) to put to the highest.
Fear of having my dreams stolen?
Aha!
Let it be from this point on that I dedicate myself to Vaermina: a renegade among atheists. Because from the inside, I may be able to dream more of dreams and search. Because it terrifies me dreams are cast upon everyone equally, I must find refuge!
And work?
We’ll put that aside for now! Please! I beg you!
Oh my!
And what of all the juggalos who became disillusioned by the curtain revealing God?
Now, I am again forgotten and without purpose, because what of them?
Am I atheist again? An atheist juggalo so guided by the wealth and weight of a story?
‘We’re not sorry that we tricked you!’, if I recall correctly.
Surely that spun a few heads around, and did you see how they sank down like a spring and shot out 50x as strong as anything imaginable within themselves?
How long did I stay in denial?
The one thing I can speculate is, order comes from the chaos! And perhaps it’s true that too much order is a bad thing, but yet, we’re still subject to the blazing heat of a never-tomorrow. And it is for this that I am eternally grateful, for a chance at story… for better or worse. Let it be!
Then, there is the note of freewill, though there is no sense in fiddling with the thought so much; time flows one way on Earth, and so, I am certain freewill is restricted by a plea for survival.
And I don’t want to find out (if I have the choice) until all these fucking ducks get in a fucking row! I am so sick of these loathsome ducks never being where they ought to be! I am so fucking sick of them not lining up like I want them to!
Then, there is a quadrilogy of secrets inside me, endlessly fighting for supremacy: one I wish I could sing, one I wish I could confide, one I wish didn’t exist, and one that means nothing to no one. Surely the reason why giving my all to dreams and Vaermina is so persuasive. Surely the reason why a purgatory called the Carnival is so enticing.
I want to grow old enough to witness community work wonders.
So, what do I do, then?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!
Write, I suppose. In an attempt to orientate intent, I’ll write, and become a teacher in this short time—what I’d already done (maybe) a couple times. And if there’s more that spills from my fingertips, I’ll, thusly, put the virtual ink to the virtual paper with virtual methodologies in mind.
I wish I could play Minecraft right now. Easy living, easy explorer!
I don’t even know how I feel about having comments published on this website, but if your comment is well-worded, thoughtful, and cohesive, I’ll probably feel guilty enough to publish it. Thanks for understanding.
PS: I’m not fond of spam. Spam-account bots don’t make me feel particularly gleeful about them.
PPS: I’ll be adding a new ‘page’ at the top right talking about general comment policy henceforth.
There are wacky ideas I’d had in the past. There are two I’d like to name here:
• Self penis growth • Self eye ‘fix’
It may come as a surprise. I haven’t emerged unscathed from wacky ideas in my life. Perhaps there’ll be a time when I really delve into what my thoughts and logic were regarding these items, but essentially, to the first, I thought for sure you could reach far back enough to access the ‘root growing’ place within the penis! To the second, because my eyesight was getting worse, I figured it made sense to take its health into my own hands and meditate on force within the eyes to achieve a beneficial result.
Neither of these ideas came to fruition. To the former, I gave up out of frustration, and it turned out that I had been controlling the muscle way back there, and in so doing, was filling my member with more blood than it would normally! The latter fell flat because no matter how much constant pressure on my eye I placed, my vision continued to get worse, and it was not until some time later that I was educated to the reality: that my corneas had lost their integrity!
I am not particularly proud of these achievements. My grandmother used to regularly bring up a writing I made on eyesight and pressure, and that was somewhat of a sore spot for awhile, honestly. It seems now she’s aware that that was a bottomless pit of intention without any notable gains.
Along with these wacky ideas, there was collateral damage, but well… I just hope those affected are living regular lives without feeling weighed down by ‘lost’ opportunity. That is the sentiment I’d like to put out there, save for the ex-roomate, ex-bandmate, (definitely) ex-friend who stole most the band merch I owned from me.
That was a dick move, Mr. Sager. Mr. Taylor, I hope you enjoyed wearing my Queensrÿche tee out in public. Fuckin’ kleptomaniacs… Yea, you think I didn’t know it was you that stole my brand new mic right from under me… Yea, I didn’t know at first. You got away with that shit. Hope it made you feel good getting back at me for whatever the fuck I did to you.
Of course, I know nothing about the psychology of kleptomaniacs. I’ll bet they steal just to steal. Whatever. Is this me deflecting away and trying to steer the conversation away from my embarrassing past ideas? My bad.
Hope ya’ll get a chuckle out of my failures! Thanks for reading!
Whenever I see a production item taking place in a castle, I have a mix of feelings rush over me. A mix of amusement, melancholy (if that’s a good word for it), and a truer suspense of belief rush over me. For reasons herein, I will attempt to express.
They’re truly doing their job: acting. There isn’t anything here to the average user/viewer. How many times have you seen a scene playing out inside a castle with those pesky humans? Often, they’ll be involved in the transformation of motion to movements we recognize as medieval; however, not always! I can’t think of a time, but there surely, have been moments of abstract play too! I haven’t the slightest what I’m talking about in this regard, though I am sure most the goals have been to portray some element of an ancient life inside these castles, as they were originally built in an ancient time, and their role in modern society does leave one to speculate what other purpose they can have… Perhaps we’ll find something truly useful in castles in the future, utilizing AI robots to hold, for instance, the most elaborate instance of super ball competitions. The future is a web of infinite untapped potential, after all. Let’s see what happens!
The main topic of this article is something of a complex item for me. I have nothing but a respect for an actor who tries their best to share an idea in the only way befitting their expertise and experience, yet there is a kind of subtle multi-layered hate that seeps into my emotion at the exposure to a product of this kind. I hate that no one can see—except you, perhaps—that these actors are trying to mimic a lost natural art. A sense of loss is part of one of the layers of hate.
While it may be unavoidable, there is no doubt that modern reproductions of human interaction will lose much of how those who inhabited and visited these fortified masses following the years of their construction and in completion. I would like to point out, this is not for the reason you probably suspect however. No, I am not concerned about the arts that we’ve lost, per se. At least, though that may not necessarily true, surely, it isn’t what flares up my emotions in some dancing cocktail in this way!
I am affected by the loss of the VE these past citizens and nobility had. And if I were to compound its nuance, it is the forgetting and ignorance of the common nature. It is gone, and no one talks about it! And that drives me up the wall!
Think of how fleeting sound truly is for a second! Once it has ceased, it ceases, thusly, surely never to be as observed again. But let this not make you think I am so sentimental that we should be recording everything! There is a beauty to the loss of sound, too, in that humanity will ring out it’s wailing and weeping for some time yet, and that will make us evolved, still. No! That issue I have is the severance of time evident in the carrying on of the generations.
And it can be once again! It can! I am desperate to believe it can be for the first time in existence… in the universe! That a pocket of humanity will realize the meaning of the final evolution of man: control of the voice.
I’d 13 years to think about where I’d be if I hadn’t lost my voice. For the sake of hypotheticals and for those who feel it isn’t a waste to delve into hypotheticals, I believe it has finally dawned on me: It’s really quite better this way… in a rather obvious way. Let’s go over the reasons briefly: (I spent all of a minute gathering my thoughts on this list!)
• Terrified of losing my voice • Didn’t understand voice’s reversing behavior • Not smart enough to understand voice’s reversing behavior on own • You don’t understand just how terrified of losing my voice I was.
Points one and four mean to emphasize that I was terrified of losing my voice. By this notion, it can be inferred that this would have continued into the future, and not just gone away, leading to more psychopathologies along the way. I already suffered from burning in the throat, lips, and eyes with and without speaking. I had never told anyone that it would happen even when not engaged in conversation; primarily, I am sure, because I was in denial of how bad it was. Listening to music and ‘working away’ was my only refuge.
Point two and point three can be lumped together as well. As stated before, somewhere along the way, I’d lost my way. Understanding how to speak normally as everyone else does was outside the scope of my abilities. ‘Taking on water’ is a good way of putting it, and for this reason alone, two and three, here, would have ensured the mystery would baffle me forever.
There is some closure in knowing roughly what you have to do to reverse course. The knowing-this-much has been so unsettling to me in the past, but I think I am, finally, seeing another image in the distance, revealing itself to me. Suspect is the reality ‘One needs to prepare the voice to lose it so swiftly’; however, have no doubt, someone will seek out to discover the validity of such a proposal… no doubt because of these writings.
I would beg you not to toy with the reversing of VE! It is a terrible place to be. No, you don’t understand what it’s like to not be able to be heard in a crowded room, talkers a’talkin’ away… How about not being able to project your voice across a street unless it’s purely quiet? Then, keep in mind, this speaks of nothing of the torture the first year or so is. It does grow back, yes, yet those first trying months are tirelessly brutal because you will not be heard without yelling as hard as you can manage! But the loss of the feeling of your own voice will deal the greatest damage!
Here I am, rather lucky in that I didn’t have to work until four years later. And somehow I managed that, with great patience for the new person I had to become and accept, hiding the pain I felt from everyone I came into contact with. The sick irony of it all is, no one will realize something of such gravity befell you! The only person who’d notice is someone who’d heard you sing before and after, and then, they’d even say ‘Why aren’t you singing the way you know how?’ And I didn’t have this luxury.
I think I’ll just publish this as is. I have been thinking of more these past few weeks, but the immediacy isn’t striking just yet!
Now, let’s all have a good ‘ha-ha’! One, two, ha-ha!
Music can be such a wild ride! It keeps you coming back for more. Can you believe it? It has me coming back for more! There is something that I haven’t heard before in this mix, and no doubt will there be something I haven’t heard this time and will hear next time. It’s a memorable-forgetful journey everytime… But maybe I should explain myself: I mean to suggest that my ears had heard it all once before! At least, my sub-conscious did, right? It is this time that something else sticks out to me! The tonality and musicianship burning new smells into my mind; images I’d never seen before, and it’s fascinating and captivating all in one breath
Give it a go, and you, too, will uncover the gold, riches, and plunder for the taking—to be exploited. It is the next logical step, after all! You will find yourself in a trance from beginning until end—until the proverbial needle lifts from the groovy black disc.
What will likely be justified is the unsettling at first blush. Or you may be overcome by wonder and awe, too! Is there resolution? I haven’t listened to this album nearly enough to say resoundingly ‘Yes!’ It would also help if theory was in my back pocket.
If the lyrics could be understood, there would be an additional realm of images revealed to the listener, each with distinct meaning and opacity, but let this not take away from the experience! Heavens, no! This is far from the experience! Instead, you are taken to the rhythm and colour of a voice so gnarly, it has you appreciate what goes into the letter s. Truly, when the voice adopts such a rough exterior, a nagging suspicion enters one’s mind: ‘He does that on purpose, doesn’t he?’
Drums fit right in the pocket. If they weren’t there, you’d be lost in the seas of riff.
Bass must be good.
Synthesizers/keyboards create that depth you so desire.
Other instruments that may or may not appear on the record are good.
Now, I’m off to listen to Skáphe’s 1st album a couple times before packing it in.
(Last edited: 01-03-24) CTRL+F is your friend!Herein, I will try to communicate all I know about necromancy, with little snippets about Necromage because it is relevant here. This page will be updated infrequently, but will be as I become aware of things in the future. Check in when the ‘last edited’ part changes; I will try to make summaries of updates available at the end of this page too. Note: I do have mods installed, but nothing that modifies leveling mechanics of NPCs. Additionally, I do not play with Dawnguard or any DLC (other than that high-res textures thing that Bethesda released). I do believe Dawnguard modifies the leveling behavior of vampires, but I know NOTHING of that!And and and…this information is applicable to someone who plays ‘SKYRIM LE’ (Legendary Edition).I know NEXT TO NOTHING of later editions of this game!
THERE ARE LOCATIONS WHERE LEVELS ARE DECIDED FOR RADIANT NPCS WHEN YOU ENTER THE CELL THE MAP MARKER/BUILDING IS LOCATED IN!!!!!!!!BEWARE!!!!!!!!And no, I do not know how to get Silvia and Vals Veran to be the levels they’re ‘supposed’ to be (or at least, higher than their minimum radiant tiers)!!!!!!!!
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Targets I know you must kill before 40 AND ARE RADIANT (this list will specify the last level you can be when they MUST be spawned into the game. More details will be provided below):
• PC=28: Bashnag and Drelas • PC=30: Master Vampires, such as Movarth Piquine and Vighar, w/o Necromage • PC=35: Northwatch Interrogator* • PC=36: Briarhearts (all that I know of) • PC=38: Master Vampires, such as Movarth Piquine and Vighar, w/ Necromage • PC=47: Ancient Vampires (Necromage not needed)† • PC=48+: Volkihar Vampires w/ Necromage
* While Interrogator is not a ‘permanent’ corpse, he will never level up once spawned in the game (none of them do). Sadly, this means you can never have level 36 Guards (in glass) and (the one) Mage at the same time as an enthrallable level 40 Interrogator. † They are typically replaced by Volkihar Vampires at PC=48. I know of only one place in the base game that spawns vampires at their stated levels on UESP (and is guaranteed), and that is during The Wolf Queen Awakened. There are two that you can choose between… four, if you’re a way higher level (sorry! I haven’t figured out the specific level all four become Volkihar!)
Targets who level beyond 40 AND HAVE LEVEL MULTIPLIERS, i.e., targets who require you to stunt your level to or below 40:
• PC=26: Erandur – has level multiplier of 1.5 • PC=32: Thorek, Veren Duleri, and Archmage Savos Aren – have level multiplers of 1.25 • PC=34: Ulfric Stormcloak, and General Tullius – have level multipliers of 1.2 • PC=37: Fjola (Bandit Leader) – has level multiplier of 1.1 • PC=40: Lu’ah Al-Skaven, Estormo, Ancano, Madanach, Borkul the Beast, Kaie, Skjor, all housecarls, Cicero, and everyone in the Dark Brotherhood. Note: Aela the Huntress, Vilkas, and Farkas resurrect for ‘hunting trips’, so they are not safe for storage! I’d read that Skjor does too, but he has never resurrected for me.
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THE RADIANT TIER LIST
BRIARHEARTS’ TIERS (7-51):
@11=7, @12=16, @20=27, @28=38, @37=51
BASHNAG’S TIERS (12-46):
@9=12, @10=19, 16=27, @22=36, @29=46
MASTER VAMPIRES’ TIERS (14-53):
@15=14, @16=23, @23=31, @31=42, @39=53
NORTHWATCH INTERROGATOR’S TIERS (14-50):
@15=14, @16=23, @23=32, @29=40, @36=50
DRELAS’ TIERS (19-46):
@15=19, @16=27, @22=36, @29=46
BUTCHER’S TIERS (1-25):
@3=1, @4=9, @8=14, @12=19, @16=25
CAPTAIN HARGAR’S TIERS (9-25):
@7=9, @8=14, @12=19, @16=25
SARTHIS IDREN’S TIERS (6-28):
@13=6, @14=10, @19=16, @25=21, @29=28 IMPORTANT: Sarthis’ level typically locks into the 1st tier! To circumvent this, save BEFORE entering Riften Warehouse, enter, load that save from the main menu. Sarthis and Orini should level up by doing this!
@20=28 Note: Obviously not done yet! IMPORTANT: Ghunzul’s level is locked in when you enter the CELL Cracked Tusk Keep is located in, not when you enter the building itself! ********In Ghunzul’s case, you can kill him, bring his body outside of Cracked Tusk Keep. Put an anchor in his inventory, leave for dur1 period, take anchor from him, wait dur3 period. Then, when you come back to Cracked Tusk Keep, wait an hour before entering the building. (From what I’ve investigated, this is how you get him to level up. No, the trick you can do with Sarthis to get him to level up doesn’t work with Ghunzul! Oh yea, and there are extra steps here, but you’ll have to forgive me, as I don’t have tons of patience to try everything for everything related to necromancy. I just know that this method does work. So, sorry if this is more work than really needed!)
ARONDIL’S TIERS (7-40):
@9=7, @10=14, @16=21, @22=30, @29=40
SILD THE WARLOCK’S TIERS (7=40):
@18=7, @19=14, @27=21, @36=30, @46=40 IMPORTANT: Sild’s level is locked in when you enter the CELL Rannveig’s Fast is located in, not when your enter the ruin!
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CORPSE BEHAVIOR SECTION:
Typically, the rule is, corpses are swept away once a ‘duration-one’ period (aka dur1 period) has passed. That is, one day plus to the next round hour. The periods of certain significance to a necromancer are ‘duration-three period’ – 30 days plus to the next round hour, ‘duration-two period’ – 10 days plus to the next round hour, and ‘duration-one period’ – one day plus to the next round hour. There are permanent corpses (they’ll never disappear nor need an anchor), and also, corpses that will reset/respawn dead back in the dungeon they were found in, too! I am not aware of any instances where a corpse will respawn, resurrect, or reset before a dur2 period has elasped. A number of corpses can be anchored-to-permanency. The general rule for corpses that can be anchored is, if they last a dur1 period, they’ll at least, be anchored until just short of a dur2 period. It’s fairly straightforward! The idea is to make them last longer in the game without needing as much maintenance!
Corpses that last dur3 period w/o anchor, i.e., permanent corpses:
Anska, Old Orc, Jaree-Ra, Ritual Master (and her three helpers), Sulla Trebatius, Umana, J’darr, Madanach and all his friends, includes Kaie, Duach, Odvan, Borkul the Beast; Atar (his relevant quest in Karthwasten must be halted. Otherwise is SFR, i.e., he is scripted for removal – and there is nothing you can do about it); Eisa Blackthorn (you cannot enter Frostmere Crypt, which means you cannot get all three Ice Form words); Salma (must be killed instead of Beem-Ja. If I recall correctly, she is SFR as soon as you leave Ironbind Barrow and Beem-Ja is dead); Kornalus; Telrav; Sild the Warlock; Chief Yamarz (beefy version (I don’t know about the weak version) will be permanent provided you haven’t finished The Cursed Tribe. It is possible to ‘legitimately’ progress through the quest and keep Yamarz as a permanent corpse if you either take Shagrol’s Hammer or let Yamarz confront you before he takes the hammer himself).
Corpses that last dur2 period w/o anchor:
Vighar (Dark Ancestor must be halted, i.e., cannot receive reward for this quest); Ghunzul; Rigel Strong-Arm; Bashnag
Corpses that last dur1 period w/o anchor:
Movarth Piquine (Laid to Rest must be halted, i.e., cannot receive reward from jarl lady)
Corpses that last dur3 period w/ anchor aka anchored-to-permanency:
Northwatch Interrogator, Drelas
Corpses that last dur1 period w/ anchor:
Any dremora (excluding summons)
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not named section
Drelas’ affinity (and level) is locked in when you enter his cottage, i.e., all you have to do to get the Drelas you want is save before entering.
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FOLGUNTHUR’S INVISIBLE WALL
Relevant if you want the strongest Gaulderson, Gaulder Blackblade and/or Blackbow (because if you lock one the other locks too)!
Mikrul 01 01Mikrul 01 02Mikrul 01 map
These three are from position #1! I chose it because it’s close to a tree! Originally, I thought you could walk up to the water, but you really can’t!
Mikrul 02 01Mikrul 02 map
These two are from position #2! I chose it because I wanted to find out if you could pick this deathbell, and you can; just don’t walk past it!
Mikrul 03 01Mikrul 03 02Mikrul 03 map
This is position #3! I chose it because there are dragonflies here that you can catch, though I don’t know how liberal one can be when pursuing them. All I know is, you can stand here and not worry! TIP OF THE DAY: Stay way the hell away from Folgunthur! Don’t even go to Morthal until level 36 (the level when Blackblade and Blackbow are max!) In fact, don’t leave Riverwood until you’re level 100, just in case!
RANNVEIG’S FAST’S INVISIBLE WALL
Relevant if you want the strongest Sild!
Sild 01 01Sild 01 02Sild 01 map
Don’t run past this rock pictured in these screenies! You’ll lock Sild if you walk farther than this point!
GEIRMUND’S HALL INVISIBLE WALL
Relevant if you’re trying to get the strongest Gaulderson, Blackbow and/or Blackblade!
Sigdis 01 01Sigdis 01 map
If you’ve ever wondered why the Gaulder Blackbow and Blackblade were weak as heck? It’s because you crossed any of the relevant invisible boundaries I’ve shown on this page, or you’ve read the book! The key level of importance is 36 when it comes to these weapons.
TELRAV’S SPAWN BOUNDARY
Relevant if you want the strongest Telrav!
Telrav 03 01Telrav 03 02Telrav 03 map
This is spot #3! It’s right outside Sarethi Farm! It’s a good idea to approach Sarethi Farm from the east or south instead of by road. You’ll see why in a second.
Telrav 01 01Telrav 01 02Telrav 01 map
Spot #1! I chose it because it’s on the road to Nilheim! Walking toward Nilheim, Telrav will level lock beyond this point if you take the road. You can give this section a wide birth to get to Sarethi Farm, i.e., stay off the road!
Telrav 02 01Telrav 02 02Telrav 02 map
These are screenies from position #2! I chose it because it’s on the way to Snapleg Cave. Just trying to show that you can’t get the paralysis staff without level-locking Telrav.
GHUNZUL’S SPAWN BOUNDARY
Relevant if you don’t want to go through the trouble of trying to get him to level up after he’s spawned stunted!
Ghunzul 01 01Ghunzul 01 02Ghunzul 01 map
You’ll notice here that I am far away from Cracked Tusk Keep. You walk past this point, Ghunzul will spawn in level-locked, indeed…
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AND MORE TO COME AS I GET AROUND TO TAKING NOTES, LEARNING, AND ADDING IT… I am currently in the process of putting together an anchor list, so there’s that… I do want to post pictures of the ‘commonly crossed’ boundary lines for NPCs whose radiant tiers are set in the ‘wilderness’ and not when entered indoors, e.g., Ghunzul, Sild, Mikrul, and Sigdis, etc.
As a closing note, I do really hope it doesn’t take me long to finish up this info package. I am hoping that by writing this as I am now that it makes me want to get those pictures up pronto! Let’s all cross our fingers! But in the meantime, I’ll release it as is because that’s the responsible thing to do!
NEW ADDITIONS SUMMARY SECTION
For edit date 29-02-24 (later in the day): • Added pictures of Folgunthur’s and Rannveig’s invisible wall • Added Tip of the Day. Blackbow & Blackblade are strongest at level 36! For edit date 01-03-24: • Added more pictures: Geirmund’s Hall, Cracked Tusk Keep, & Telrav/Nilheim invisible walls
